Response #142 (cruella) January 16, 2001

There's just something about the 12 Sandy. The time before I was taking
it back from the airport, I was sitting staring exhaustedly into space
when we stopped next to a bingo hall. A little old lady about three feet
tall, carrying a Raggedy Ann doll as big as she was, got on. She sat
right next to me and smiled beatifically, slid back in the seat so her
little tiny legs and feet stuck straight out into the aisle, and said "I
got Lil' Orphan Annie here so's she'll bring me LUCK but she didn't bring
me no luck." I said, "Oh, I'm sorry." "Yeah, I brung her so she'd bring
me LUCK but she didn't bring me no luck."  "Too bad."  "Yeah, she's
supposed to bring me LUCK but she didn't..."  ad nauseum.  I stared at the
seat some more.  Next stop an elderly drunk got on, tried to find his bus
pass in his pants, and fell over on my little dwarf lady pal.  Another bus
patron and I pulled him off and threw him over to the seats across the
aisle.  During all of this, his eyes were closed and he was ranting
quietly about the "g-d lady cops in this town."  I looked at the dwarf
lady apologetically, and she smiled at me and said "I brung Lil' Orphan
Annie here! She-" "was supposed to bring you luck, I know."  The drunk
across the aisle was getting louder, and had moved on to speculating about
the sexual preferences of the lady cops in town.  I looked over at another
seat, and tried to visualize everyone on the bus getting up and doing a
choreographed sing-along of "what a girl wants" in order to block out what
was happening.  "She was supposed to bring me LUCK!"  "GoddAMN lesbo
COPS.  Alla them.  Alla them look like HER!" "..what a girl
wants..." "Lil' Orphan Annie!"  

And right at that point, the drunk across the aisle stood up and pointed
at me and yelled "LESBO!"  An old guy sitting next to him hit him in the
arm and said "DON'T YOU TALK LIKE THAT TO THE LADIES!"  And I got off the
bus and walked the rest of the way home.

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