inkwell.vue.141 : Cynthia Heimel - Advanced Sex Tips for Girls: This Time It's Personal
permalink #26 of 260: David Gans (tnf) Mon 25 Feb 02 15:09
    

Also: Where do cats fit in?
  
inkwell.vue.141 : Cynthia Heimel - Advanced Sex Tips for Girls: This Time It's Personal
permalink #27 of 260: excessively heterosexual (saiyuk) Mon 25 Feb 02 15:42
    

> The sexual landscape when I was growing up:  It was all diet books, all 
the
>  time.  Maybe Women who love too much had come out, I'm not sure.

Honey, when you (and I) were growing up, all there was for girls -- except 
for the secret handbook that none of you will ever spill about -- was 
Facts of Life and Love for Teenagers by Evelyn Millis Duvall. It said "for 
teenagers" but, trust me, it was only for *girl* teenagers. So I spent my 
adolescence trying to snag my big brother's copy of The Cadillac 
Illustrated Encyclopedia of Sex. 
  
inkwell.vue.141 : Cynthia Heimel - Advanced Sex Tips for Girls: This Time It's Personal
permalink #28 of 260: David Gans (tnf) Mon 25 Feb 02 17:33
    

"Pornography and the Law," at my grandma's house, was as hot as it got circa
1962.  Of course, I was eight years old.

When did "The Sensuous Woman" come out?
  
inkwell.vue.141 : Cynthia Heimel - Advanced Sex Tips for Girls: This Time It's Personal
permalink #29 of 260: just some misplaced Joan of Arc (strega) Mon 25 Feb 02 18:15
    
Yes, of course once a month but you are right; when there was no Problem
Lady we channeled her. Can only do that over weeks not years. That was the
best letters column in the history of the universe. Plus it was funny
enough to get us howling like idiots.

We'd grab a Village Voice, run back to V.'s NYC dorm or my apartment on
St.  Mark's place, and flip through for Problem Lady or the regular column.
We wore black, we were totally cool human beings, and we were young in
Greenwich Village.

Okay, so how many of those letters to the Problem Lady did you write
yourself? Some of them were just too damn good to have come in by chance.
  
inkwell.vue.141 : Cynthia Heimel - Advanced Sex Tips for Girls: This Time It's Personal
permalink #30 of 260: Carol Gunby (raku) Mon 25 Feb 02 19:12
    
Re: 16

How about bookstores? I notice your tour this time around has been primarily
(if not all) independent stores. Has it ever been thus? And if not, do you
notice a difference in the audience? The chapter on boundaries has the most
succinct description of the concept I've read -- would have been a great
shortcut through therapy a few years back, not to mention being a lot
funnier.
  
inkwell.vue.141 : Cynthia Heimel - Advanced Sex Tips for Girls: This Time It's Personal
permalink #31 of 260: r (thaisa) Mon 25 Feb 02 20:30
    

 dahling Cynthia-of-Oakland:

 would you actually give a reading anywhere? like in the paper
 mill at Lewistown, Pennsylvania? tell me no!

 one thing that struck me about your book is that the humor
 never seems forced. it's just funny. so I wondered if you
 knew, as you wrote, that something was funny, or discovered
 it afterwards, or were, in some way, surprised about it in the
 process of writing--or were trying to be funny.  I suppose I'm
 talking about the differenc between making a big huge artistic
 effort, which often is strained, or finding the voice that just
 says it.
  
inkwell.vue.141 : Cynthia Heimel - Advanced Sex Tips for Girls: This Time It's Personal
permalink #32 of 260: Bradburn Young (bradburn) Mon 25 Feb 02 20:58
    

Cynthia, you don't have to answer about who wrote the Problem Lady questions
if you don't want to.
  
inkwell.vue.141 : Cynthia Heimel - Advanced Sex Tips for Girls: This Time It's Personal
permalink #33 of 260: excessively heterosexual (saiyuk) Mon 25 Feb 02 21:40
    

You don't *have* to. 

But we'd hate to have the GAO *sue* you to release that information. 

Just saying. 
  
inkwell.vue.141 : Cynthia Heimel - Advanced Sex Tips for Girls: This Time It's Personal
permalink #34 of 260: just some misplaced Joan of Arc (strega) Mon 25 Feb 02 22:29
    
Okay, most of them were too good to have come in by chance. Unless all the
girlz in NYC were channeling the PL, except for the ones who were channeling
Patti Smith but maybe even some of them. But not the ones who were
channeling Deborah Harry.
  
inkwell.vue.141 : Cynthia Heimel - Advanced Sex Tips for Girls: This Time It's Personal
permalink #35 of 260: David Gans (tnf) Mon 25 Feb 02 23:06
    

Cynthia, what is the modern-day equivalent of the "reproachful martini"?
  
inkwell.vue.141 : Cynthia Heimel - Advanced Sex Tips for Girls: This Time It's Personal
permalink #36 of 260: Dr. Leda Horticulture (leroy) Tue 26 Feb 02 07:00
    

Cynthia, I really like Thaisa's comments about your use of humor, and how it
doesn't feel forced. I struggle with this issue myself--I somehow signed up
to write a monthly column about growing roses that's supposed to be funny,
but the truth is, after about three months I ran out of all the funny things
there are to say about growing roses. Admittedly your subject matter is a
gold mine in comparison. But your humor seems to flow so naturally and
easily. It's not forced or stale or cruel. Is it just that you've spent your
life learning to see the humor in every single thing and body? Do you ever
have days where you wake up and the goddamn world is just NOT FUNNY and
you're so weary of humorhumorhumor you want to throw up?
  
inkwell.vue.141 : Cynthia Heimel - Advanced Sex Tips for Girls: This Time It's Personal
permalink #37 of 260: Neil Gaiman (neilgaiman) Tue 26 Feb 02 08:11
    
Cynthia -- but what about Leave it to Psmith, where Psmith winds up in
Lord Emsworth's employ (and is thereafter never seen again)?
  
inkwell.vue.141 : Cynthia Heimel - Advanced Sex Tips for Girls: This Time It's Personal
permalink #38 of 260: Bloody hell (acronychal-8) Tue 26 Feb 02 09:53
    
Cynthia -

I've been reading your stuff since I was 11 - my father had a
subscription to Playboy. I, like, love you.

So here's my question: You are the original 'Sex and the City' chick.
In every interview or commentary regarding one of the new,
'innovative,' female writers of the sex books, you are never given
credit for being an influence or paving the way.

Does this piss you off? 
  
inkwell.vue.141 : Cynthia Heimel - Advanced Sex Tips for Girls: This Time It's Personal
permalink #39 of 260: David Gans (tnf) Tue 26 Feb 02 10:02
    

If anyone out there on the web would like to participate, send your comment
or question to inkwell-hosts@well.com
  
inkwell.vue.141 : Cynthia Heimel - Advanced Sex Tips for Girls: This Time It's Personal
permalink #40 of 260: a nose full of kafka (plum) Tue 26 Feb 02 11:37
    

ccarol ccantor.  papillons remember things for a really long time.  they are
yes, little fluffy doggies who look like they have no discernable purpose,
but NO!  Papillons are often service dogs for people in wheelchairs!
Papillons have been know to pick up the laundry and make the bed and I'm not
kidding.

Also, the bay area is full of people who
a)  think they know everything and
b)  think that their lives should be perfect because they pay so much to
live here, and
c)  have a really viral case of political correctness.

And guess what I had when I first moved here?  An SUV.  It was wrong and
evil but how did I know?  I thought it was cool and British.  Now I have a
honda and nobody leaves notes on my car anymore.
  
inkwell.vue.141 : Cynthia Heimel - Advanced Sex Tips for Girls: This Time It's Personal
permalink #41 of 260: a nose full of kafka (plum) Tue 26 Feb 02 11:38
    

David your question actually is, "How come you're such a fabulous writer,
Cynthia?"  And my answer is a gentle, regal nod.  I can't give away writing
secrets for less than one million dollars.
  
inkwell.vue.141 : Cynthia Heimel - Advanced Sex Tips for Girls: This Time It's Personal
permalink #42 of 260: a nose full of kafka (plum) Tue 26 Feb 02 11:39
    

also David, cats fit in anywhere they want to.  cats are very cool beasts.
I wouldn't have one, but that's just me.
  
inkwell.vue.141 : Cynthia Heimel - Advanced Sex Tips for Girls: This Time It's Personal
permalink #43 of 260: a nose full of kafka (plum) Tue 26 Feb 02 11:40
    


Andy you are right.  I was actually thinking more along the lines of  when I
actually decided to write sex tips for girls.  I wasn't actually
prepubescent then.
  
inkwell.vue.141 : Cynthia Heimel - Advanced Sex Tips for Girls: This Time It's Personal
permalink #44 of 260: a nose full of kafka (plum) Tue 26 Feb 02 11:42
    

strega, I prefer to have a veil covering the answer to which problem lady
answers I wrote myself.  A woman must protect her modesty.
  
inkwell.vue.141 : Cynthia Heimel - Advanced Sex Tips for Girls: This Time It's Personal
permalink #45 of 260: David S. Greene (dsg) Tue 26 Feb 02 11:42
    

Ms. Heimel?
When do the *boys* get a book?
Just wondering.
  
inkwell.vue.141 : Cynthia Heimel - Advanced Sex Tips for Girls: This Time It's Personal
permalink #46 of 260: a nose full of kafka (plum) Tue 26 Feb 02 11:47
    

whoops!  I meant problem lady *questions*, strega.
  
inkwell.vue.141 : Cynthia Heimel - Advanced Sex Tips for Girls: This Time It's Personal
permalink #47 of 260: F (fom) Tue 26 Feb 02 11:48
    <scribbled by fom Tue 26 Feb 02 11:49>
  
inkwell.vue.141 : Cynthia Heimel - Advanced Sex Tips for Girls: This Time It's Personal
permalink #48 of 260: a nose full of kafka (plum) Tue 26 Feb 02 11:50
    


raku, I am reading at plenty of Barnes and Nobles.  They audiences are
actually great!  But of course my heart beats for the indies, yes, and the
indies seem somewhat more aware that I exist.  Please everybody look at the
nice review of my book in PEOPLE magazine of all places.
  
inkwell.vue.141 : Cynthia Heimel - Advanced Sex Tips for Girls: This Time It's Personal
permalink #49 of 260: Gail Williams (gail) Tue 26 Feb 02 12:17
    
Wow, that's reach, Cynthia.

Getting out there for generations of girls/grrls/etc.
  
inkwell.vue.141 : Cynthia Heimel - Advanced Sex Tips for Girls: This Time It's Personal
permalink #50 of 260: excessively heterosexual (saiyuk) Tue 26 Feb 02 12:40
    

>  Papillons have been know to pick up the laundry and make the bed and 
I'm not
>  kidding.

Yeah, tell me about it. I lay out my clothes all nice and neat, and then
go out for a while. When I get back, Mikey has moved everything around on
the bed. While it's possible that he's making an aesthetic statement amd
trying to be helpful, it seems to me more like he's adjusting things for
*his* comfort.
  

More...



Members: Enter the conference to participate

Subscribe to an RSS 2.0 feed of new responses in this topic RSS feed of new responses

   Join Us
Home | Learn About | Conferences | Member Pages | Mail | Store | Services & Help | Password | Join Us