Carol Wolper (carol-wolper) Fri 9 Aug 02 00:54
My biggest influences are not necessarily writers. The people who spur me on are the people who refuse, and I stress the word REFUSE, to compromise their beliefs, credo, morals etc. I realize that's an old fashioned concept in this world that only acknowledges fame and fortune. But I am so, so bored by the famous. Yeah, like it's interesting to see people put their self esteem in the hands of any, and I do stress ANY, publication that will take their picture. NO. But every so often I meet someone who has their own light and it gives me the inspiration and motivation to keep going. That probably sounds corny but I'll live with that label.
David Gans (tnf) Fri 9 Aug 02 09:47
I love that. Someone said it's not hard to make a million bucks if you don't care how you do it. I'm a 48-year-old emerging singer-songwriter, 25 years too late to be entering that guild if you look at how the business works these days, but I am having the time of life out there singing my song my way. And keeping my day job. There's a speech by Richard Gault near the end of "Secret Celebrity" that I really like, and I think it fits here: "In the end, all you can do is whatever you can to help the species evolve up a notch, score more points for the creative side. And have as good a time as you can while you're doing it."
Kosher Swan (shmo) Fri 9 Aug 02 10:18
Isn't it Charles Foster Kane in "Citizen Kane" who says, "It isn't hard to make a million dollars if all you want to do is make a million dollars."?
Linda Castellani (castle) Fri 9 Aug 02 10:44
Carol, who are some of the folks you've met who have impressed you with their own true light?
Carol Wolper (carol-wolper) Fri 9 Aug 02 11:06
Before I answer that I should add that even those who have managed to hold onto their light don't have it all the time. Keeping it requires what a friend of mine described as "eternal vigilance". It's a daily challenge. Some days it's there, some days it's slipping. I think the key thing is that one's intent doesn't change. And I love people whose intent is to keep their light going. Examples of that: (Some on this list you'll know, some you may not) Sean MacPherson: He owns (and creates) restaurants on both coasts. Try pulling up the profile the New York Times Sunday magazine did on him a few years ago. You'll see what I mean. Jack Nicholson because he's a true artist. His next movie "About Schmidt" , written and directed by Alexander Payne might be his most quietly powerful performance yet. Ted Demme: A director who tragically died earlier this year. Teddy was one of those guys who brought life into a room with him. And there are others, of course. But I thought I'd just give you the short list.
Linda Castellani (castle) Fri 9 Aug 02 11:09
Thank you for that. What happened to Ted Demme? Thank gopod for www.imdb.com! His picture looks so familiar.
Carol Wolper (carol-wolper) Fri 9 Aug 02 15:08
Ted died of a heart attack while playing basketball. He was so young. 37. All his friends were devastated. As I said earlier, he was one of those guys who could change the mood of a room (for the better) just by walking in. He had a gigantic spirit - which still lives on in his wife and kids.
Linda Castellani (castle) Fri 9 Aug 02 19:13
That's really terrible, Carol. I'm so sorry to hear it. Listen, this is really a sad note on which to end this discussion, but our two weeks is up, so let's not consider it over if you would like to stick around and chat with us some more, and maybe we can get to a more upbeat ending. Thank you so much for being with us. I am enjoying the discussion and hoping to learn more.
Carol Wolper (carol-wolper) Fri 9 Aug 02 19:34
You guys have been great . And I'm all about upbeat endings. Real ones, not Hollywood ones.
David Gans (tnf) Sat 10 Aug 02 10:28
Thank you so much for joining us! We can keep this conversation going as long as we like...
F. R. Beavis (rodman) Sat 10 Aug 02 13:21
I've been a fly-on-the-wall for this conversation and I've learned a lot, and been impressed no end by <carol-wolper>. Brava! And thanks to the hosts for setting this up.
Angus MacDonald (angus) Sun 11 Aug 02 13:17
One of my orthodontists died playing basketball. A theme in the book that kept whapping me was the characters' fear of aging. I'm forty-three and a half, so each time Christine freaked out about being thirty-five was a jolt. Jennifer and PsG seemed even more hung up on it, despite being a dozen years younger, and then William told the reader he was unable to consider being with a woman who had a varicosity on her leg. I've always known that age acceptance is a gender issue, and read about it being amped up some in show business, but were you exaggerating much for satire there or is that stuff just reporting?
Carol Wolper (carol-wolper) Sun 11 Aug 02 15:45
I live in L.A. (Hollywood) Age is a huge issue here. On this particular playing field, anyway. I'm not saying it's that way all over the city - but in my world it is. And I'm not exaggerating. Of course it's worse with actresses because so many of them get hooked on being lust objects. Watching them trying to deal with losing that attention is not a pretty sight. However, the good news is I know a lot of women over thirty five who are having a much better time than they did in their twenties. More flaws (maybe) but fewer fears.
David Gans (tnf) Sun 11 Aug 02 16:23
I have known a few people who would be lame enough to reject a woman on the basis of a varicose vein or two. Hard to believe,but there are people who are that shallow.
Linda Castellani (castle) Sun 11 Aug 02 18:20
Carol Wolper (carol-wolper) Sun 11 Aug 02 20:02
But actually I understand that character's choice. As he explains it - that's his no go zone. There are certain things that can clash with one's sensibility. In a Nick Hornby book it might be someone who listened to Mariah Carey. How many women will say that in their search for a guy, bad shoes is a deal breaker? This all sounds very superficial but I think you've got to distinguish between deleting someone from your potential date list and deleting someone from your friendship list. The male/female dating hook-up is tricky. And you can't fake it. Either you're attracted to someone or you not. And if you do fake it, that's a bigger problem. Don't you think?
excessively heterosexual (saiyuk) Sun 11 Aug 02 20:46
Bad SHOES???!!! Oh, Carol, this could explain SO much! I'm not even sure what shoes would be bad, and whether mine count. But you've given me another reminder why I keep myself in one of the other LA universes, one that runs almost parallel to the one in the book and only bumps up against it now and then, leaving a ding on both, though undoubtedly the larger ding is on mine.
Jon Lebkowsky (jonl) Mon 12 Aug 02 07:22
Now I'm wondering how you define bad shoes? As in old & worn? Or cheap?
Carol Wolper (carol-wolper) Mon 12 Aug 02 08:21
I'm just using shoes as an example. Don't we all have things that just clash with our sensibility? Doesn't matter what it is. Could be anything. One of the things that I tried to do with the character of William is show that he understood how easily changeable this whole falling in and out of lust thing can be. I'm not saying he liked it but he got that that's the way it is and if you wanted to call him shallow, he'd understand. By the way, even though he falls out of lust with the girl, at that moment he also acknowledges his appreciation and respect for her as a person. Separate issues.
Linda Castellani (castle) Mon 12 Aug 02 12:55
Okay so you've whetted my appetite! How do I buy the book?
Carol Wolper (carol-wolper) Mon 12 Aug 02 13:13
Amazon.com? Or if you live in Los Angeles, Book Soup on Sunset. Barnes and Noble in Santa Monica. Brentano's in Century City. Tecalote in Santa Barbara. After you read it, I'd love to hear what you think. It seems to inspire a variety of reactions. Which I guess is a good thing.
Members: Enter the conference to participate
Non-members: How to participate