The WELL: inkwell.vue.305: Regan McMahon, "Revolution in the Bleachers"

#119: Lisa Everitt (lisa) Thu 23 Aug 07 08:43

Thu, 23 Aug 2007 08:43:00 PDT

Thank YOU for writing such a great, and sane, book. Best of luck to you. [Read entire topic]

#118: Regan McMahon (r-mcmahon) Wed 22 Aug 07 14:06

Wed, 22 Aug 2007 14:06:00 PDT

Thanks, everyone, for making me feel so WELLcome. [Read entire topic]

#117: Gail Williams (gail) Wed 22 Aug 07 11:50

Wed, 22 Aug 2007 11:50:00 PDT

I love all the true tales from the trenches too. Great discussion all around. [Read entire topic]

#116: Cynthia Dyer-Bennet (cdb) Wed 22 Aug 07 10:36

Wed, 22 Aug 2007 10:36:00 PDT

What a fascinating conversation this has been, the past two weeks have sped by so fast! I want to thank you for joining us, Regan, it's been great to have you here. And thank you, Bill, for your important role in leading the discussion.

Though you've reached the two-week committment, please know that you're welcome to continue here if you can. This topic will remain open and available for further conversation indefinitely. If you have other things demanding your attention, then I offer my thanks for sharing so much of your time and expertise with us, Regan and Bill. [Read entire topic]

#115: put me in coach, I'm ready to play (watadoo) Wed 22 Aug 07 06:27

Wed, 22 Aug 2007 06:27:00 PDT

Ethan just got asked to play on the San Francisco Sabercats. It was so refreshing. One of the other parents asked the coach about tournaments and the he said, well probably a couple over the course of the year. We let the parents tell us how many they want to commit to and if we have enough buy in, we'll go. It's up to you guys collectively to tell us what you want to do. w.o.w. refreshing.

Four of Ethan's friends from the Berkeley team have all also come to the SF team. We all went out for dinner afterwards and it was just so fine to watch the 5 boys having so much fun together at teh table we put them at far away across the room (five pre-teen boys who've just been skating hard for 90 minutes are pretty ripe, let me tell you. I am so relieved as the Oakland team culture was such a nightmare. Straight out of the worst case scenarios from your book, Regan with tight-lipped grim parents pacing behind the glass and growing orders at their kids to try harder and "stop doggin it" So unfriendly and over-amped for a bunch of 1 and 12 year olds. I think the head coach thinks he's Herb Brooks and the Oakland Pee Wees are the 1980 miracle team. har. [Read entire topic]

#114: I dare you to make less sense! (jet) Tue 21 Aug 07 21:56

Tue, 21 Aug 2007 21:56:00 PDT

I've spent an unusual amount of time in the past year with college freshman in a peer-level situation. I'd lay folding money that lacrosse is the next soccer in terms of high-profile, high-expense, high-pressure team sports for junior high and high school students. It's amazing how hard they have to work to stay competitive and how much of their college time training and games can consume. [Read entire topic]

#113: Regan McMahon (r-mcmahon) Tue 21 Aug 07 21:00

Tue, 21 Aug 2007 21:00:00 PDT

re starting new leagues: I've heard from people who have done that. One of the women in my book, Marin County psychotherapist and author Madeline Levine ("Theh Price of Privilege") did that when she became dissatisfied with her son's hypercompetitive elite soccer team. She joined other parents who jumped ship and together they switched gears entirely, starting a lacrosse league! And her son went on to play Lacrosse on his high school team. So it all worked out well.

Sometimes it's good to vote with your feet, as they say. That's what those Berkeley kids did when they marched over to San Francisco to play on a hockey team that was more in tune with what they were comfortable with.

It can be hard work finding the right team or league, or the right coach for your kid, but it's worth it rather than staying in a situation that's frustrating or against your value system or lifestyle or whatever. It can be hard work being a sports parent! [Read entire topic]

#112: Regan McMahon (r-mcmahon) Tue 21 Aug 07 19:44

Tue, 21 Aug 2007 19:44:00 PDT

I hear that kind of thing often: That parents -- or a kid -- will think a decision about a team taht they make when the kid is 7 or 8 or 10 will mark them for life. But it's just not true. As I said before, puberty cahnges everything, and the cream rises to the top. So if your child is gifted athletically, they'll probably be good at whatever they try whenever they get into it. If your kid is an average athlete, she'll probably be an average athlete at whatever she tries, but she may come to love a sport that's fun for her. Kids kids who start early may have more training than kids who come into a sport later, but when they enter is not the determining factor. Puberty might be. Or their natural ability might be. The Golden State Warriors basketball team had a player who who hadn't picked up a basketball till 10th grade. It happens!

Your 7-year-old, as you said, was discourged by one bad experience. A year from now she may have a good team sport experience and be begging you to sign her up. There's plenty of time!!! [Read entire topic]

#111: Sharon Lynne Fisher (slf) Tue 21 Aug 07 13:16

Tue, 21 Aug 2007 13:16:00 PDT

#107: oh, another heartbreaking thing about that conversation -- her telling me that she'll never be any good at it because the other kids have all been playing so much longer.

At 7. [Read entire topic]

#110: Lisa Harris (lrph) Tue 21 Aug 07 08:26

Tue, 21 Aug 2007 08:26:00 PDT

We have something like that here. But you have to have a coach/business person/teacher/parent willing to take on the responsibility of starting a league. It's a lot of work and commitment. The thing we have here is actually a summer program run by a middle school PE teacher. He teaches basics and sportsmanship in an array of different sport camps throughout the summer and during school holidays. It's really wonderful, but not year round, because of his teaching schedule. [Read entire topic]