Eclectic Views

    
Ah yes.

Indeed, you have a reality-based assessment of the situation.  There could
be trouble in the form of bad publicity, jail time and/or cat calls from
really unattractive strangers.

Because, in fact, we have entered a Contested Domain.  Whether or not people
in a democracy should be allowed to stand shortless in the street is a site
on contestation and struggle.  Madison Avenue and, indeed, those
aforementioned authorities would prefer that you not focus on that bigger
picture.  They would rather you work on your own cellulite and doing
something about that pesky little risk-aversion.  Keeps the market economy
pumping and keeps social disorder to a minimum.

If I were to be of help to you, I might ask you WHY you define yourself as
"kinda risk averse" and whether that serves to bring you closer or take you
further away from engagement with life and the characters who populate it.
If I were to be of help to the world, however, I would shout out, "DON'T ASK
ME!" and push you out away from the stifling embrace of experts and
authorities.

See how complicated things become?  Wouldn't be happening, either, if we'd
all just wear jumpsuits.
  

    
I interrupt this program with a late but fervent protest:

I DO NOT HAVE AN EMPTY BUTT!

You'll be hearing from my lawyer.

And now back to our regularly scheduled program.
  

    
Litigious Pear Shaped Client.....

OK, next question!
  

    

COuld we discuss Pear's butt?
  

    

I'd like show of hands for who "sees" <clmyers> as "Climbers"
  

    

FRAULEIN DOKTOR KRAKPOT:

How can we know anything?  And if we can't know anything, how can we
know that?

This has been bothering me for years.  

Signed

Clueless in San Anselmo
  

    
> How can we know anything?

I try to live by the words of the Greek philosopher Gorgias of Leontini
("gorgeous Gorgias"):

"Nothing exists.
 Or if it exists, it cannot be comprehended.
 Or if it exists and can be comprehended, it cannot be communicated."

It simplifies so many things; or at least it would if they existed.
  

    
ronks is my intern.  His job is to sit around in the waiting room and do
assessments and dispense philosophy as such.  Do I pay him, you ask?  HELL
NO!  He pays me.

Clueless Client, let's pause for a moment and see if we can get to the
bottom of your concern.  What would you say is generating this concern of
yours?  What purpose does it serve to struggle with these questions?

You see, you behave as if the CONTENT were "what it's all about" (ref. Hokey
Pokey).  I'm telling you it's the PROCESS that matters.  The questions and
the answers could be anything or nothing and it's still the same.  It's the
act of contemplation and the role that plays in your life that matters most.

So you tell me: what IS it all about, Clueless?
  

    
Dear Dr. Krakpot,

How can we tell the difference between what behavior is natural and
what's not natural?

Sincerely
Confused
  

    
Hello Confused,

Here's my rule of thumb:
If it's behavior you do yourself, it's natural.
If it's behavior you have to pay someone else to do for you, it's not
natural.

heh heh heh, ah yes, sometimes I do krak myself up.

Confused Client, we've built this whole country on separating the "natural"
from the "not natural" and conscripting the "natural" into supervising the
"not natural" among us.  We catagorize, stigmatize, supervise, and keep
copious notes on the Not Natural.  And all for what?

Do you think we would descend into chaos if we simply STOPPED THIS MADNESS?
Behavior is behavior.

Is it hurting anybody, including you?  If so, it's BAD BEHAVIOR, whether
natural or not.

Is it helping anybody, including you?  If so, it's GOOD BEHAVIOR, whether
natural of not.

Is it helping some people and hurting others?  If so, it's right up there
with 99% of all the other behaviors and therefore statistically "normal",
but does that solve the riddle of the difference between what's "good" and
what's "right"?

Is it having no impact whatsoever?

Don't you see, Confused Client?  If you don't have a ready answer, then it
probably just means you're asking the wrong question.
  

    

>So you tell me: what IS it all about, Clueless?

It's all about money.  Except when it's all about something else.
  

    
But I thought it was all about: Alfie!

(ok, I'm showing my age!)
  

    

Dear Fraulein Doktor Krakpot,
I've been told that not all the psychics that advertise on tv are real
psychics, and that Dr. Laura woman isn't a doctor of anything useful for
what she's supposed to be talking about, and I don't even know what kind of
degree Dr. Phil has, and come to think of it, I'm not sure who Dr. Pepper
is at all, and what kind of degree Dr. Pepper has, and then there's
also Dr. Brown, who makes terrific cream soda and root beer, but I don't see
why you'd need a medical degree to make a soft drink.

So I guess my question is, what kind of degree do you have, and are you a
real Doktor, or do you just play one here on the internets, and if you are a
real Doktor, why do you spell it like that?  Is that how they spelled it at
the school where you were?  Did they do that to be special, or were they
just bad spellers?

Thanks,
Koncerned
  

    
I think the Clueless Client's therapy is going SPLENDIDLY, don't you all?

And coiro brings up another question to ponder:
Is it just for the moment we live?
(ok, I'm older than she is.)
  

    
Whoa, I was slipped by the "paws up" guy!

And what he says is so true.
We've also got the Dr. Scholls and the Dr. Suess's and the guy who comes
crying in here every week, whining "Doctor, my eyes have seen the years and
the slow parade of tears without hiding.  Now I want to understand...."

Heh.  Don't we all.....

So, to answer your question I have a:
M.A. in Counseling Psych, a
M.A. in Organization Development
a license to practice marriage and family therapy in the state of California
a Continuing Education provider number for nurses, social workers and
marriage therapists,
a 4/5th of the way cooked PhD in Human & Organizational Systems, and
a Certified Tax Preparer's license circa 1996.

Next question!
  

    
whoopsie I forgot to answer the other part of the question:

"Doktor" is EXACTLY how my title is spelled in a fake German accent.
Because until I finish that damn dissertation, I ain't no freakin' "doctor".
 But I AM an excellent "Doktor", doncha know.
  

    
Thank you Doktor,

I now know less than when I asked the question and I'm feeling better
already.

Sincerely
Confused

P.S.  Re: "If you don't have a ready answer, then it probably just
means you're asking the wrong question."

Huh?
  

    
Just remember,

  There are no stupid questions; only stupid questioners.
  

    
He's right, of course.

Next!
  

    
I don't recall asking for lip from the gallery. And then! The good
docktor agrees with it. The wound may never heal.
  

    
My PROFOUND apology, sir. (ma'am?  It's hard to tell!)

Please go on.  I was agreeing IN GENERAL; not in particular.

Please don't sue me.
  

    
Excuuuuse me, but I couldn't help noticing that the lip came not from
the gallery, but from the intern, so it was kosher, so to speak.

signed,
Paying Attention

P.S. - Doktor, I am thinking of what question I need to ask, so as not
to waste your time or my money. Back soon. 
  

    
Dear Paying Attention Client,

Thank you.  I must contemplate firing that damn intern, cheeky young
fellow that he is.

And for you, do you want the good news first or the bad news?  Let's
start with the good news.  I'm always here for you.  OK, the bad news. 
I'm costing you money whether you're talking to me or not.  Might as
well start yakkin', girl!
  

    
Attention is the best pay.
  

    
well, no, it isn't.  One wants money.