SILICON SOAPWARE wafting your way along the slipstreams of the Info Highway from Bubbles = Tom Digby = bubbles@well.com http://www.well.com/~bubbles/ Issue #165 New Moon of June 3, 2008 Contents copyright 2008 by Thomas G. Digby, with a liberal definition of "fair use". In other words, feel free to quote excerpts elsewhere (with proper attribution), post the entire zine (verbatim, including this notice) on other boards that don't charge specifically for reading the zine, link my Web page, and so on, but if something from here forms a substantial part of something you make money from, it's only fair that I get a cut of the profits. Silicon Soapware is available via email with or without reader feedback. Details of how to sign up are at the end. ********************* Given how June has traditionally been associated with weddings, it seems appropriate that a court ruling legalizing same-sex marriage in California is currently scheduled to take effect around the middle of June. Of course things may end up not following the current schedule. The court could decide to postpone the ruling until after the November elections, or the Feds could intervene, or any of a number of other more or less unlikely things could happen, but for now it looks like this will be a rather special June for weddings. ********************* This reminds me of another question about weddings: Is it OK for someone with multiple personalities to marry several wives (or husbands or whatever) as long as each is married to a different personality? ********************* I saw that new Indiana Jones movie a few days ago. This one was (according to Wikipedia) set in 1957. What would it be like set in the present day? One big problem would be the main character's age. His "official" birth date (again according to Wikipedia) is July 1, 1899. That would make him well over a hundred years old today. People have lived that long or longer, but it's quite rare. And even if he was still alive, he probably wouldn't be in any shape to go romping around through jungles and deserts and up and down mountains and over waterfalls and such. He probably wouldn't be all that good in a fight either. Still, there might be a work-around. Perhaps friendly space aliens can give him some sort of rejuvenation treatment or something. Or maybe he spends twenty or thirty or forty years in suspended animation in some top-secret government facility or beneath the ruins of some ancient temple or the like. There are many ways it could be done, at least in the context of that series. And they might have some fun with people having trouble believing that he's the same person who mysteriously disappeared so many years ago. Likewise, he could play up the Rip Van Winkle angle of reacting to how the world has changed. So again, the character's age may not be all that much of an obstacle. What may be a bigger problem is that the world has indeed changed. Swashbuckling loners have less of a place now than they did half a century ago. If some stealth mission were to require one person out there on his own, the decision-makers would tend to think in terms of James Bond, not Indiana Jones. And even if there was something for Indiana Jones to do in some land that time forgot, he wouldn't be venturing out alone. He would be accompanied by a crew in constant communication with people back home who would be tracking his every move via satellite links or the like. I suppose the technology could somehow fail, leaving our heroes to fend for themselves at the moment of peak peril, but how many times can that kind of thing happen before it becomes a cliche? One way out would be to have key parts of the action take place in some alternate dimension or some such, but now we're getting away from Indiana Jones toward something more like Stargate. So again, the world of today may not be big enough for the likes of Indiana Jones. ********************* Someone I know recently said something about his cat having several names. That led to thoughts of giving a cat nine names, one for each of its nine lives. But how would one know what name was which? I don't recall ever hearing anything about a cat's lives being distinct in any particular way. You usually can't tell which is what by just looking. I'm not sure even the cat knows. But then maybe there need not be any particular linkage between lives and names. The nine lives may collectively have nine names with no attempt to define which is which. It might be analogous to what in the context of property ownership is called an "undivided common interest". But whatever the relationship of names to lives is, would the cat really care? ********************* "The deity you have attempted to invoke is busy with other worshippers. Your call is very important to us, so please stay in circle and your call will be answered in the order received." ********************* I do a fair amount of walking, and often notice pennies lying on the ground. I generally pick them up. Others say it isn't worth the trouble. So is it worth it? If it takes you five seconds to pick up a penny, you're making $7.20 an hour. Although that doesn't seem like much nowadays, especially since it doesn't come with health insurance or other benefits, it is effectively tax-free. And if the act of picking up a penny doesn't take time away from other work you're getting paid for, then even $7.20 an hour may be better than nothing. So for now I'll probably keep picking up pennies. ********************* More thoughts on picking up pennies: Even if pennies you find are technically taxable, as a practical matter it's seldom if ever enforced. I suppose they'll eventually have video cameras and GPS systems and such built into coins to keep track of such things, but it'll be quite a while before the cost of the technology gets that low. And if they do develop ways to keep track of lost pennies, what if the powers that be decide that any lost penny you notice is taxable income even if you decide not to take it? I recall something vaguely analogous involving stock options at the end of the dot-com boom, possibly having to do with Alternative Minimum Tax. Some people had to pay taxes on money they could have made but didn't, or something like that. I don't know the details, but I do recall that there was lots of fuss about it at the time. At lunch a few days back we got onto the subject of scattering pennies on the sidewalks in less affluent parts of town as a sort of charity. Those who really need the money will pick them up, while those who are better off financially will be more likely to ignore them. So we won't need bureaucrats investigating everybody to determine who should be given welfare benefits and who shouldn't. ********************* On the other extreme from picking up pennies, there was a little item in the news where someone was arrested after trying to cash a check for $360,000,000,000 (three hundred and sixty billion dollars) at a bank. Even if the teller had not had any reason to question the legitimacy of the check, they probably would not have had that much cash in the drawer right then. So it would have come to the attention of the teller's supervisor, and possibly others in the bank's chain of command. In addition, there may not have been enough money in the owner's account to cover the check. That would have been another sign that something was amiss. Be the details as they may, someone in the approval chain contacted the owner of the account the check was written on. The owner said the check had been stolen, so people at the bank called the cops, who arrested the guy trying to cash it. ********************* Someone on LiveJournal was complaining about a parking ticket he got. It was one of those streets where they do street sweeping a couple of days per month, and he got confused about the dates. That led to thoughts of some kind of wireless computer network thingie in those parking-restriction signs that would tell your car's computer whether or not it is currently OK to park there. It should also be smart enough to figure out situations like when it's OK to park there now but you'll need to move by tomorrow morning. Besides giving a readout of the details, it could also blink at some varying rate or show colors or something to give a rough non-verbal indication of how soon you'll need to move. That should reduce the chances of the information not registering because you have your mind on something else. Also, I expect cars of the future to have their own cell phones. So the car could call its owner with some sort of "Come and move me before I get a parking ticket" message. Yes, it may cut the revenue cities get from parking tickets. But where the goal really is to keep streets clear and traffic moving safely (rather than just a sneaky way of raising revenue) it would be a good thing to have. And it may not be that much of a money-loser if it's also smart enough to notify the cops when there's a vehicle parked there illegally. That would improve the ratio of tickets written to man-hours spent patrolling, so it could be a winner even if fewer tickets are written. ********************* In other news, the airlines are starting to charge extra for services that used to be included in the basic fare, such as checked baggage. So how long will it be before passengers hear something like this: "In the event of a loss of cabin pressure, oxygen masks will drop from the ceiling. Simply put the mask on over your nose and mouth, then slide your credit card through the slot to start the flow of oxygen." ********************* Back on marriage, there's the Selkie legend: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Selkie The Selkie comes out of the water as a seal, then takes off the seal skin to become human. He or she must put it back on to return to the sea in their seal form. In a common form of the legend a man finds a female Selkie's skin and holds her captive by denying her access to it. He marries her and they start a family. Is that really the kind of thing you'd want to base a loving marriage on? It makes sense in the old context of women as property, but it doesn't fit well with the currently popular concept of both parties to the marriage being equal partners who expect married life to be mostly happy. I think I've heard songs and/or stories of Selkies remaining human voluntarily, or going back and forth on some sort of monthly or annual cycle, but I don't know how common that version of the story is. ********************* Speaking of magic and the sea: Shores of Wonder I keep getting on mailing lists for ocean cruises: A week or two of tropical islands Or icy fjords Or ancient ruins along desolate shores. I find the brochures to be interesting reading Even if I never really plan to go. One that came today was Different. At first glance it seemed like more of the same, With a page showing Terms and Conditions And lists of prices And diagrams of which room is where on the ship. But then came the good part: The description of the cruise itself. We set sail from Florida Toward the infamous Bermuda Triangle, To that secret point along the hypotenuse That marks the gateway To the kingdom of the Fairies. We follow the shores of that magical land, Stopping here and there to spend a day Exploring its cities and castles And even the market places, Although we are warned not to buy anything. Much of what looks like treasure there Will turn to dust and ashes When we bring it home. In the evening we retire to the safety of our ship. To watch and listen from afar As the fairies frolic in the moonlight. Were we to go and join them Our loved ones at home Might never see us again. On another day we drop anchor Out in the middle Of what looks like no place special. Then underwater cameras bring us Mermaid's-eye views Of what remains of Atlantis. The more adventurous may don scuba gear For a closer first-hand look. One corner of the map is marked "Here be Dragons". That does not deter us, For the tour company has made a treaty with them. In exchange for bits of treasure (included in the price of the tour) We are given safe conduct Through those otherwise perilous seas and islands As giant winged forms pass to and fro overhead. A few of the dragons let us tour their caves, Where we marvel at the treasures They have amassed over centuries, Along with half-melted armor that is all that remains Of many a brave but foolish knight. There is one area we dare not enter: The Sargasso Sea, graveyard of lost ships. We detour around it at a safe distance Lest we too come to grief there. Finally, our ship returns Through the secret gateway Along the hypotenuse of the Bermuda Triangle, Back to our "normal" world. I set the brochure down Next to the rest of the day's mail. While I don't think I will go, I do find the thought quite tempting. -- Tom Digby First Draft 11:03 Sun April 6 2008 Revised 02:26 Wed June 4 2008 ********************* HOW TO GET SILICON SOAPWARE EMAILED TO YOU There are two email lists, one that allows reader comments and one that does not. Both are linked from http://www.plergb.com/Mail_Lists/Silicon_Soapware_Zine-Pages.html If you are already receiving Silicon Soapware and want to unsubscribe or otherwise change settings, the relevant URL should be in the footer appended to the end of this section in the copy you received. Or you can use the above URL to navigate to the appropriate subscription form, which will also allow you to cancel your subscription or change your settings. -- END --