Later as I looked at the patterns in my life I saw
the same scenario repeated
again and again.
Something comes into my life -- a beautiful place
meaningful work
or something of such great importance as
love.

There is a series of events that make that person
(or thing or place) particularly desirable.
But then little by little that person or place is withdrawn,
and then there is only
frustration.

I studied the patterns.
And then it seemed to me that,
as if I were Hester in The Scarlet Letter,
the same controllers who interfered with my life
had devised sadistic punishments
for the behavior that they themselves instigated.

I imagine that they have appropriated the world
as a stage for their perverted voyeurism.
They show us what love might be,
incite our desires,
and then destroy our dreams.

We ask for sanctuary