Excerpt from Frank City - an encounter with the Dallas police

The waitress walked over to our booth with two glasses ot water. Two cops - a tall one and a short one - walked in the door and headed straight for us. They stood behind the waitress.

The waitress looked at Fat Roy's blinking eyes. She looked at my shaking hands and tapping feet. She backed off. She spoke to the two cops: "You want a word with these - uh - gentlemen?"

"It'll keep," said the tall cop. His head looked like a pyramid. His lips were a thin line. As I watched through white and yellow pops I saw that his flesh was brown, scaly. He was a horned toad. "Take the order," sneered the horned toad. "If you think they're good for it." He folded his paws across his soft scaly chest.

The short cop tucked his thumbs under his belt. He looked sort of friendly and stupid. Pop pop went my eyeballs. He had a hairy neck, pointed ears, a soft round nose. He was an armadillo.

Fat Roy slipped a twenty-dollar bill out of his pocket and laid it on the table. He pressed it smooth with the side of his hand.

The waitress licked the point of her pencil.

Fat Roy looked directly at the horned toad, blinked, and said, "I'd like an order of milk and cookies."

Horny snorted. Dillo giggled.

"Got no cookies," said the waitress.

"Then gimme some nice chicken broth."

Horny pawed the floor.

"Got no broth," said the waitress.

Fat Roy blinked. "Then gimme the usual."

"What's that?"

"I dunno. What's usual?"

"Wa-al, we got chicken fried steak, we got - I dunno. We got chicken fried steak."

"Okay," said Fat Roy. "That's it."

"Me, too," I said.

She wrote it down and left. The two cops stepped up to the edge of the booth.

Fat Roy smoothed the twenty a few more times. I tapped my feet. I couldn't stop. We didn't look up. I unfolded and refolded my napkin. Fat Roy drank a glass of water. Pop pop pop went my eyeballs.

Horny broke the silence: "Excuse me, girls, but is that your truck out there?" His voice was like fingernails on a blackboard.

Fat Roy narrowed his eyes.

"It's mine," I said.

"You know one of your tail lights is burned out?"

"Yes sir. I mean no sir. It's not burned out. It's broken."

"You know you're in Texas?"

"Yes sir."

"Dallas, Texas?"

"Yes sir. I noticed that."

"Maybe it's different in Californey. In Texas, we use two tail lights."

"Oh really?"

"Don't get smart."

"I'm not smart."

"Boy, I'll say."

"Yes sir." Pop pop.

"Let's see your license."

"Yes sir." I didn't move.

"Where is it?"

"I don't know."

"You don't know?"

"I haven't seen it in a long time. I think I - "

"I was driving," said Fat Roy. "Here's mine."

"Thank you, miss," said Horny with a hiss of his pointed tongue.

Soft-nosed, big-eyed, Dillo hadn't said a word. He just stood there with his thumbs in his belt.

"I ain't miss," said Fat Roy.

"I was looking at your hair."

"Maybe you should look at my dick."

"Don't move." Horny drew his gun and held it with both paws. "Don't lift one finger."

I tried to stop tapping my toes. I couldn't. I held my hands tight on the tabletop.

The waitress came up behind the cops with our steaks. She didn't seem to know what to do with them. I think she wanted to give them to us and get away, but she didn't want to cross the line of fire. As I watched she changed color, pink to white. Chameleon.

I saw the front door of the coffee shop open, but I couldn't see who came in. Whoever it was stayed by the door.

Fat Roy was scowling and blinking at Horny.

Horny scowled right back at Fat Roy. He rubbed his claw up and down the trigger. I prayed he wouldn't hiccup.

Dillo just stood there. He was looking at me oddly. He wiggled his nose. Suddenly he said to me, "You know a girl named Linda Lou?"

"I don't know anybody," I said. Dammit feet. Keep still.

"In Frisco I mean. You all from Frisco?"

"Yes. But I don't know any Linda Lou."

He turned to Fat Roy. "You?"

Fat Roy shook his head. He kept his eyes on the gun. Horny was still rubbing his claw up and down the trigger. The gun was pointed at the spot between Fat Roy's blinking eyes.

"I do."

The voice came from the door of the coffee shop. We all turned our heads - me, Fat Roy, Chameleon, Dillo, even Horny with the gun still in his paw.

It was Moon. Lion cub. "I know a Linda Lou."

Dillo hustled over to him. He pulled a crumpled shapshot out of his pocket. "She look like this?"

Moon studied the picture. "That's her," he said.

"Listen. Don't leave. I'll be right back." Dillo rushed out the door.

Horny groaned. He holstered his gun. The waitress reverted from white to pink. She served our steaks. Moon sat down at our booth.

Dillo returned with an envelope. He put it on the table in front of Moon. "Will you give it to her, please? It's a letter from her mama."

"I sure will," said Moon. He tucked the envelope in his pocket. "I should be back there in a few days. I'll see she gets it."

"Thank you," said the cop. "Her mama sure would appreciate it. Tell her that daddy still loves her. Will you do that? Tell her - tell her she can come home. Her bed's all made and we'll buy her that new record player. Will you tell her that?"

"You bet," said Moon.

"You boys take care now. Safe drivin'."

The cops left. The tall one was grinding his teeth. The short one was smiling.

"Happy trails to you," Fat Roy called after them.

A moment later I looked at Fat Roy, but he had disappeared. A bulldog was eating his steak.

I turned to Moon. "Who's this Linda Lou?"

"I don't know any Linda Lou," said Moon.