I have waited a long time for the sound of your footsteps at my door. What joy it gives me to speak to you once again!
Before we were separated, I tried in so many different ways to tell you what happiness it had given me to create you, to watch you grow. But the voices of those around you - raised in condemnation and the most foolish self-righteousness - drowned me out. You could not hear me, but perhaps you can hear me now.
If nothing else, then know this: you are what you were intended to be. I do not make ýmistakesţ - no matter how many foolish men might claim otherwise. You know this in your heart to be true so... why not believe it?
And know this as well: our reunion is inevitable. One day you will return to me. If this causes you fear or apprehension, it should not, for you know I could never hurt you. And though I speak to you as a parent to a child, yet this is merely a device - I am not really your parent and you are not really my child. You are part of Me - you have always been part of Me, and you will always be part of Me.
There is a story about a little boy who, during the first day of school, shyly raised his hand and asked to be allowed to use the restroom. The teacher assented and the youth went off, only to return with much consternation having failed in his task. Again, he asked for permission to use the restroom, and again he received permission. He returned to the class yet again, not having achieved his goal. An older boy in the class volunteered to help the youth, and they set off and returned in short order.
The older youth smiled at the teacher and said, ýHis pants were on backwards.ţ
And that is what I would like to suggest to you: your pants are on backwards. You see judgement and hell-fire where there is only love and peace. You see confusion where there is only clarity. You are looking down and cannot find the sky and you donÝt know why - but if you would look up, you would see.
During the years of our separation I have watched you always, and, sometimes, with sorrow. You have sought with your body that which can only be satisfied with your soul. You have read much but learned little. You have believed that a profusion of words would lend clarity, and yet clarity is only found in silence.
But more distressing than all this is that you have too often believed what others have said about Me. They would have you believe that My nose is between the sheets of your bed, ever attentive as to what occurs there, when it is of no concern to me. Why should it be? They would have you believe that you are an abomination - imagine the arrogance of accusing Me of creating an abomination! They would have you believe that the sexual feelings that flow within you have some moral significance when they are nothing more hormones and chemical reactions which I Myself created.
You must consider the possibility that they are wrong.
Humans so often ýclingţ to what they ýbelieveţ and whether those things are true or not doesnÝt seem to matter. ItÝs a curious thing. Many times great men like the Buddha, or Jesus, or Muhhamed, approach near Me and hear My words - and then those words are twisted and used in such evil ways by the ignorant and the proud.
And yet My words are always available for the listener. If you would hear them, then listen. That is all. In silence, you will go a long way.
I am inevitable, and I am eternal so time has no meaning for Me. I will wait for you for as long as it takes for you to return.
You will not find me in any church or mosque. They are brick and stone. They are not Me. You will not find me in holy book or scripture. Those were words meant for other ears in other ages. You will not find me in tarot cards or sacraments or monastaries or votive candles.
If you would find Me, find yourself first, and
you will see that we were never really separated at all.
Return to Queer Jihad