Subject: family bliss
My dear Scumbucket --
Excellent, excellent, excellent. Your report on your progress with the young family indicates that you are applying your knowledge well.
I want to make sure you note, however, that you do not really deserve all the credit (as I am sure you are aware). If you have been making inroads, it is only because many others have been ahead of you, creating circumstances and conditions for you to take advantage of. (I only remind you of this because success tends to breed ambition, and ambition for someone at your level can be -- well, unhealthy. I am sure you comprehend my meaning, and rest assured that I am only looking after your interests.)
Consider, for example, the status of the family in the North American culture, the crippling of which is the source of your present good fortune. The isolation of the "nuclear family" has proved to be one of our most successful strategies in recent decades. That, combined with the stresses that we have built into the so-called "free market system" (about which I simply must write in more detail later) provide an environment that is a perfect laboratory for pushing your subjects to the breaking point.
Your report shows that you are indeed mastering the techniques involved. And they are deceptively easy, after all, aren't they? For instance, it is a simple thing to introduce an obsession into the mind of a toddler -- the notion that she must immediately have *this* toy, or *that* cereal served in *this* bowl in precisely *this* fashion. This isn't a sin in itself, of course; the very notion of "sin" doesn't even become valid for these creatures till they are older -- but, ah, the effects on the parents!
Either the parents can be brought to the point where they cave into their youngster's every demand (which certainly improves our chances when the child encounters the real world expecting the instant fulfillment of its wishes), or they can become increasingly strict disciplinarians, eventually susceptible to being pushed into abuse or worse. (Remember in these cases the Law of the Excluded Middle -- never allow them to establish balance!)
You can try combining techniques to devastating effect. Just as the harried family is headed for the door for example, and the parents are beginning to imagine that perhaps *this* morning they might get off to work on time without incident (and don't forget to play out all the imaginary consequences of tardiness -- ah, the timeclock: what an excellent invention!), *then* you whisper "Oh! Don't forget, you wanted to wear your *green* dress today, not this one!" Even better, wait until the car is *just* out of the driveway. (If you wait too long, then return becomes out of the question, unless you're very skillful.) We've been able to set off long chains of abuse using such scenarios.
Eventually, of course, the parents get to work -- but more about that in my next post.
As ever,
Screwdisk