A certain Texas zoo had acquired a very rare species of gorilla. Within
a few weeks, the female gorilla became very ornery,  and difficult to
handle. Upon examination, the zoo veterinarian  determined the problem.
The gorilla was in heat. To make matters worse, there were no male
gorilla of the same species available.
 
  While reflecting on their problem, the zoo administrators noticed Ed,
a part time Texas Aggie college student, employee responsible for 
cleaning the animals' cages. Ed, like most Aggies, had little sense and
possessed ample ability to satisfy any hairy female, but he  wasn't very
bright. So, the zoo administrators thought they might have a  solution.
Ed was approached with a proposition; would he be willing to have sex
with the gorilla for five hundred bucks?
 
  Ed showed some interest, but said he would have to think the matter
over carefully. The following day, Ed announced that he would  accept
their offer, but only under three conditions.
 
  "First," he said. "I don't want to have to kiss her.
  "Secondly, I want nothing to do with any offspring that may result
from this union."
 
  The zoo administration quickly agreed to these conditions, so they
asked what was his third condition.
 
  "Well," said Ed. "You've gotta give me another week to come up with
the five hundred bucks ..."