advice.... health.... relationships
art and football....politics.... religion
technology....body odor relations....television
some horiscopes....miracle cures....the WELL ....toilet paper
transportation.... food.... success

go screw!

The escape of a genetically engineered tomato
from U.C. Berkeley laboratories has caused grave
concern in the East Bay today. The tomato,
which is 2 feet in diameter, disease resistant,
and speaks 3 languages, is reported to have told
EPA officials: "When you gotta go, you gotta go."

Judy Malloy (badinfo)

Powdered cream makes a *GREAT* adhesive....
try it!

Artcom (artcomtv)


"Yes, they are difficult to put on," a spokesman
for the tiny condoms said this morning,
"but believe me, it's worth it."

Judy Malloy (badinfo)

LES, a new laser envelope sealer was announced today by Laserland. The sealer is expected to save millions of secretaries from being fired when asked by their bosses to "put this letter in this envelope and seal it."

Now, instead of replying: "If that is too hard for you, Mr. ----------, I will be delighted to do it," they can reach for LES!

Judy Malloy (badinfo)

Coathangers are made by steeping old paperclips in radioactive waste.

carter scholz (csz)

IBM produces state-of-the-art computers.
Pushing technology to its limits.

David Hawkins (dhawk)

FLASH! FLASH! A new study just released from Stanford claims that mirror reflections are the basis of "true" reality. For years the "puzzle" of the reflection was studied, and NOW science has arrived at the conclusion that the investgation was from the wrong side. Stanford researchers are urging people WORLD WIDE to turn their mirrors around. "lets see the other side of life," they exclaimed! Most are puzzled when it comes to daily acts as brushing teeth... or messing up the hair! Whats next? Who knows!

Artcom (artcomtv)

U.S. Department of Energy officials continue to report that an accident as bad as Chernobyl couldn't happen here because 'free world' technology is better than Iron Curtain technology.

Tom Mandel (mandel)

Build a DNA Synthesizer in your own home!
nucleotide synthesis reagents, and an engineer.
keep the engineer in your closet.

For more projects, see the new WELL conference, Screw it Youself. (at the ok prompt, type go screw)

Judy Malloy (badinfo)



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